Tuesday, November 27th, 2007...10:56 am
New York City? Get a rope
It is our Thanksgiving tradition, to leave the city every year. we went to Playa del Carmen, Mexico, for a friend’s wedding. The year before that, we went to New York City.
This year, The Princess and I decided to repeat Turkey 2005 and headed back to the City, the only City, to celebrate an apocryphal story that helps our children every year resupply the nation’s dwindling “turkey hand” epidemic.
I woke up sick as fuck on Wednesday morning. “Sick as fuck” has a particular meaning to me that might vary, to a certain degree, from what it would mean to you. To me, “sick as fuck” means a head cold that has melted my brain to the point that I act like a helpless, unwanted newborn.
The Princess, a middle school teacher whose Job-like patience might explain why she hasn’t systematically killed every one of her students yet, doted on me. Her doting, though, consisted of telling me to “suck it up”, “be a man”, and “sleep on the couch”. (While reading this excerpt, the Princess told me: “You’re a wimp when you’re sick.”)
I did sleep on the couch. And Thursday morning, despite hallucinations that Nicole Kidman and a polar bear were after my Golden Compass, I woke up at 7am to leave DC. A nearly five-hour trip can be pretty taxing when you can’t focus your eyes on the traffic on I-95. It can be even worse when your head cold makes you forget entire stretches of time. Luckily, The Princess’ Honda Accord gave us a moment of unmitigated glee when its odometer surpassed the 190,000-mile mark. With this kind of excitement to entertain us, we just knew it was going to be a fun weekend.
Day One (Thanksgiving Day)
Lincoln Tunnel is traffic-free…the streets of New York are dirty after the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade…thanks to my friends Blue and BK Broiler, for letting us crash at your awesome pad in Union Square…damn it, Strand Bookstore is closed…hot chocolate from Max Brenner and an unseasonably warm afternoon of walking around…dinner in Chinatown…General Tso’s Chicken and eggplant with broccoli at Wo Hop…some old man sits down at our booth across from me while The Princess is in the bathroom…and he doesn’t say a word.
Day Two (Friday)
Brunch at Le Pain Quotidien…finally, two hours shopping at the Strand…not enough time, only buy five books…Black Friday on Broadway Ave. is not a pretty sight…late lunch at Katz’s Deli, where they filmed Meg Ryan faking an orgasm…we sit one table over from it and hear one “I’ll have what she’s having” joke too many…best matzo ball soup I have ever had…
…karaoke that night at Sing Sing…The Princess sings like a gifted lark…with my nasally head cold scraping my vocal chords, I sound like a wounded seagull…still manage to sing my song, “God Bless the U.S.A.” by Lee Greenwood (click to watch YouTube video of my awful singing and The Princess laughing maniacally at me)…Udon noodles for late dinner…mine is served with a raw egg.
Day Three (Saturday)
The Princess goes shopping down Broadway while I sleep in…she buys me bagel with lox and cream cheese for breakfast…we walk to Union Square Park and Greenwich Village…visit Porto Rico Importing Company (the best smelling coffee since I was in Costa Rica)…buy way too much cheese, sausage, and olive oil at Murray’s Cheese…The Princess tries to sneak into a guided tour of how they make cheese…share some Pinkberry frozen yogurt…watch Hogan Knows Best and eat amazing meal…call an audible and decided to beat Sunday’s traffic by leaving NYC that night…get home at 12:20am, great call.
Day Four (Sunday)
While thousands of people jam the tunnels out of NYC, the New Jersey Turnpike, and I-95, The Princess and I sleep in…spend the day relaxing, reading, watching DVDs, laughing, wrestling…go to sleep early…Nyquil knocks me out.
This trip, we decided, was not so much a vacation to New York, but more of a vacation from our lives in DC that just happened to be in NYC. We didn’t do anything too “touristy” like visit the State of Liberty or even walk through Central Park. We just enjoyed being together in a city we both love.
21 Comments
November 27th, 2007 at 11:24 am
Karaoke has become an I-66 New York staple. The little booths allow you to embarrass yourself privately.
I mean, you’re going to embarrass yourself anyway, so it’s just damage control.
Exactly. The best part is when your song ends and it’s quiet and you can hear other patrons singing in their booths loudly and awfully. You laugh until you realize that you probably sound the same to them when their songs end.
November 27th, 2007 at 11:40 am
I’m willing to bet that there was some Green Day performed that night.
Of course.
November 27th, 2007 at 12:23 pm
“some old man sits down at our booth across from me while The Princess is in the bathroom…and he doesn’t say a word.”
…at least he didn’t eat your cookie.
Believe me, I started to wonder if another “cookie story” was in the works.
November 27th, 2007 at 12:24 pm
You forgot the moustache rides you sold for 5 cents on the Bowery…
They’re up to 50 cents, times are getting tough.
November 27th, 2007 at 1:05 pm
True that about the matzo ball soup at Katz’s…
I try to explain to my friends that I’m not just “that tourist” going in there, but once they taste it, they recognize the skills…
That matzo ball was so amazing I struggled between wolfing it down and slowly enjoying it. I found a happy compromise.
November 27th, 2007 at 2:29 pm
I’m still not entirely convinced that you’re Jewish. I see you holding that Matzo soup, but it doesn’t look natural. It seems kind of forced, like when Karl Rove tries to rap and dance hip hop.
Also, I not-so secretly believe that the Princess is a member of the tribe, but doesn’t know it yet. Maybe she’s part of that lost tribe, except that she doesn’t know she’s lost.
Also, I’m not a fan of Katz’s. It’s too touristy (like Carnegie). Much better Delis in Brooklyn. Leave Katz’s to the goyim.
Yes, there were many goyim there, but also so many Jews it was great. Then again, maybe they weren’t Manhattanites but rather tourists visiting, I don’t know. It was very different compared to 2nd Avenue Deli, which I loved but closed more than a year ago.
If you think me holding the soup looks forced, you might have been convinced otherwise if you had seen me it.
November 27th, 2007 at 3:03 pm
Where is this Broadway Ave. of which you speak?
“It is the oldest north-south main thoroughfare in the city, dating to the first New Amsterdam settlement. The name Broadway is an English translation of the Dutch name, Breede weg.”
That one.
Oh, right, no “Avenue” suffix. Whoops.
November 27th, 2007 at 4:07 pm
Becca beat me to it, never heard anyone call it Broadway Avenue.
Great re-cap, you had a much more stellar Thanksgiving weekend than I had.
I thought it sounded odd. I’m surprised my own best friend, who lives in NYC, didn’t say anything about it.
November 27th, 2007 at 4:50 pm
Whenever I go up to New York Shitty, I prefer to go to places no one really knows about or doesn’t really go to on a normal city tour. Ends up being phenomenally more enjoyable that way.
The more often we go up, the less touristy things we end up doing each time, and the more fun we have.
November 27th, 2007 at 5:04 pm
I wish I could do karaoke in a private room at least once a week. I went all the time with my friends in Japan, and it’s the most unstressed I’ve ever been in my life. Seriously, all-night karaoke (til like 5 a.m.) and all you can drink for $20-30? Yes, please! The karaoke in NYC is a nice substitute, but holy cow is it expensive!
And in Japan, the speakers work ALL the time plus they have that one Japanese song you like to sing.
You? Stressed?
November 27th, 2007 at 6:56 pm
It’s one of those things that identify that I’m speaking to someone in Indiana when I’m ordering something.
me: please ship to, 1234 Broadway-
sales rep: is that Broadway street or avenue?
me: just Broadway
sr: Broadway what?
me: have you never heard all the songs? like “on Broadway” and such?
sr: pardon?
me: (sigh) just put Broad Way, thanks
And here I was thinking I actually fit in to the City. “Bleeker? Yeah, it’s just a few blocks south of here.” “What’s that? No, you want to take the Lincoln Tunnel into the City.” I’ll just stick with my DC knowledge.
November 27th, 2007 at 7:03 pm
ah, but do you know confused people get when I tell them to “take a left on Avenue” and they ask “which avenue?” and I have to explain it’s called Avenue Road
but you left the best part where you returned home to awesome mail!
This is true (believe me, I left a lot of good stuff out), H sent me the first half of Season 6 of Spooks, or MI-%, the greatest show no ones in the U.S. has ever heard of.
November 28th, 2007 at 12:25 am
i LOVED the karaoke video. too funny. was your karaoke japanese style? because that is by far the most fun. i went all the time too when i lived in japan.
i heard annandale has a few places that have japanese style karaoke. when are we all going?
No, it was primarily Korean, like the one in Annandale I went to years ago. I think it might have closed down, though. Set it up, I’m in.
November 28th, 2007 at 9:01 am
ohhh you’re making me miss the city. i always had to go to the strand with a plan of what to buy or i’d spend wayyy too much money. (though i should say the union square barnes and noble is by far the most beautiful one i’ve ever been in…) there used to be a philippine restaurant around there that i’d go to with a friend for breakfast that included the most wonderful plaintains… best city on earththth.
TP and I never have a plan when we go to Strand. We intend to print out our Amazon or Goodreads wish lists but we always forget so we spend hours combing through every nook and cranny of the store until we feel guilty that we’re spending too much money.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:10 am
If you really like untouristy locales, try visiting the east 80s between 2nd and 3rd ave. Lived there for a year. Did you know 82nd around there is the only block in NYC where people have garbage disposals?
INTERSTING!!!
Yankees suck.
I thought you were upper west side. You know, Columbia and shit.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:10 am
Spellng can be reiwarding.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:27 am
I am totally and thoroughly jealous of what sounds like a fantastic weekend. But is MI-5 still good without Tom and Danny from Season 1?
I didn’t think it could be, but it is just as good, if not better, for different reasons. Season 5 will amaze you more than Season 1 did.
November 28th, 2007 at 10:47 am
went to columbia but lived on the upper east. Cmon redacted, I know where I lived.
Do you, though?
November 28th, 2007 at 11:30 am
[…] contact-me New York City? Get a rope […]
November 28th, 2007 at 1:43 pm
“We just enjoyed being together in a city we both love.”
Aww, that last line almost got me a bit teary. Sniff Sniff.
You’re such a girl. Actually, while reading it over, she suggested I add the word “together”, said it would sound better. Looks like she was right.
November 28th, 2007 at 6:10 pm
Arjewtino, how is it that you always manage to have a “New York moment” with homeless or weird people? Last time you had the guy in the subway, now the guy of the booth. Hilarious.
And I totally get the just relaxing and not doing sight seeing. I did the same thing, but in Mexico City.
I really don’t know how this shit happens to me. I told a story about something weird happening to me recently, to which she replied, “This stuff ONLY happens to you.”
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