I don’t know, how do you tell your mom you want sex?

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I care about my blog readers. I care about what they think, how they want to be entertained, and what embarrassing incidents in my life I can write about to make them feel better about their own lives.

I even care about their search queries:

• “A Christian boy wants to date a Jewish girl, where can he find one?”
• “Did Flock of Seagulls become millionaires?”
• “How to tell your mom you want sex?”

Many pro bloggers will tell you that knowing your audience is vital to the success of your blog. But judging from some of the bizarre searches some of my readers conducted to find this blog, I sometimes think the less I know, the better.

For example, these guys might want to get together to devise the best mom-banging strategy, with or without their friends’ participation:

i wanna bang your mom
i want to bang my friends mom
i want to bang you and your mother
hot mom around 38 having sex
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These searchers need advice on dating Jews or attending universities with a high proportion of Jewish people:

how to date jewish girls
is it ok for jewish people to date outside their religion?
my boyfriends mom doesn’t approve of me because i’m not jewish
do jewish guys like non jewish girls
shiksa looking for a jewish man
jappy colleges

These inept Internet users are just plain horny:

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seeing boobs of neighbour secretly
men in their wet underwear porn

Some Web lurkers want international guidance:

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brazilian fucking on river

These confused people thought these two DC bloggers were well-endowed or Jewish:

cookie hung
roosh hashanah

And maybe these searchers just wanted some information on:

–how to eat for free–

steal from target

–whether Who’s the Boss? was animated–

alyssa milano cartoon character

–or a very specific physical ailment–

what do it mean when u have tickle in my throat to make me cough when you not sick?

I hope Arjewtino.com helped these Web users. If not, then at least they entertained you.

This post was inspired by Magic Jewball’s monthly Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions posts.